Lets reach out to people – new contacts

Are 18 and 19 year olds teenagers? In number yes. In reality, they are young adults who can vote. Here is a group of adults that I heard is terrific. They even meet for coffee, of course these days on line. Look into it. https://www.myusara.com/events

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Quarantine – Difficult? Reach out!

Finding the isolation the Corona virus has placed us in difficult? You are not alone.  Reach out. Talk it over with someone who understands.   The National Alliance on Mental Illness has good suggestions. Telephone Help Line: 1-800-950-6264 or info@nami.org

Lets Discuss The Pros and Cons of Quarantine

No doubt you have heard all the do’s and don’t’s  to protect yourselves from getting the Corona virus. If you are in close quarters with your family be aware that those who suffer from addiction may drink or drug more.  If this is going on in your home and you feel you are in danger of getting hurt by any inappropriate acting out PHONE 911. They are very busy at the moment and if you can’t get through PHONE THE NATIONAL ABUSE HOT LINE 800 799 7233.

Don’t have a cell phone? Can’t get to your phone? Get in touch with someone on your computer. The National Abuse Hot Line does have a “chat” ability. If you have to leave the house keep these phone numbers in your pocket.  If your hometown has its own abuse number, a safe house you need to keep that number also in your pocket. Think where you could go if you need to leave the house. Do you have a face mask so that people will feel secure when you approach them for help? If not, remember to stand 6 feet away. Be prepared.

You may also want to read the following: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/201906/how-stay-mentally-strong-during-crisis

If you yourself have addiction problems try to go to a meeting on line. You know what to do. Just google Alcoholics Anonymous, In The Rooms etc.

Be good to yourselves. Take care of yourselves.


Who is worried, stressed and anxious?

I am going to start this blog by suggesting that you read https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/26/smarter-living/the-difference-between-worry-stress-and-anxiety.  It is well explained and will help you to deal with those emotions. Everyone has been worried about the Corona-virus. Will I get it? Should I go out with my friends?

Let’s look at some other things. Are your parent or parents or in some cases your sibling more into addiction because they are “worried” about the Corona-virus?  People who suffer from addiction handle their emotions of worry, anxiety, stress by drinking/drugging. A healthy person who does not suffer with addiction takes action. The healthy person follows the directions given by the physicians in charge of this pandemic. You know the advise: wash your hands, stay away from crowds, be aware of symptoms. This may be the time to join Ala-teen, In The Rooms, Adult Children of Alcoholics (over age 18) online. Go for it. Be good to yourselves.

A New Year, New Thoughts

Happy new year one and all.  Hopefully you had good holidays. Very often addicts use the holidays as an excuse to celebrate with drugs and alcohol. Ah yes, alcohol is a drug too. But lets talk about you. Planning any new year resolutions. Resolution is an easy word to understand but tough to carry out. So lets distinguish between wishes and what is realistic. Realistic is you because you can resolve to be in charge of yourself in a responsible way.

Parents aren’t there to help at all times? Then have a plan what to do at such a time. Is there an adult you admire and who is willing to be your friend? If not make it your business to join a great youth group such as the Boys and Girls Club. People there really care. Is there a church or synagogue youth group? Go for it. Remember you are worth it.



The holiday season is always an excuse for drinking and drugging. But then people who suffer from addiction will always find an excuse to satisfy their cravings. If you are in a home where the  addictive habits really burst forth during the holidays there are several preparations you and your siblings can do.

  1. Make a list of relatives and friends whom you feel comfortable visiting. Phone them and ask if in an emergency you could stay with them.
  2. Always let your parents know where you are spending the night. Don’t just tell them but also write the name, address and phone number down and safety pin the paper on your bed. If your parents have email send it to them as well.
  3. If you have no place to go have the phone numbers of your local Alcoholics Anonymous, and other addiction help centers available in case you need to talk to someone.
  4. If all else fails be prepared to phone 911.
  5. Depending on your relationships with your mother and father, the holidays are sometimes a good time to discuss what worries you about your parents’ habits. It is important to talk to your parents in a positive and non-insulting way. For example instead of saying, “I hate it when –“ you might say, “I really worry when you —, or “My feelings hurt when you —“.

It may also be a good time if you are affiliated with a church or synagogue to talk to your clergyman about your personal concerns. Make some plans of your own where you can let off some steam. Is there a pool near your home? Bowling Alley? A gym? You get the idea. Get some activities going. To all my web site visitors a healthy, prosperous and peaceful holiday and new year. May you find the strength within you to make your wishes come true. Believe in yourself.

What teenagers and young adults are doing?

The big news among teenagers and young adults is alcohol/drug FREE events. Yes, not everyone wants to sit next to someone taking drugs or who smells of alcohol. More and more drug/alcohol free events are being organized. Want to know more? Go to https://recoverymonth.gov/events/find-events .  Just look for the listed concerts. Want to know how to organize them in your area? Simple. When you find an event that says to you, “I wish we had this in our town,” click on the event and scroll down until you come to the organizer’s email. You know what to do now. Email him/her and ask how can I do this in my town? Chances are you’ll get contact numbers in your area of people willing to organize it. Remember Benjamin Franklin’s saying -“Nothing ventured, nothing gained.”

For Teen Mom and Dads

If you are a teenage mom or dad, whether single or married, you might feel overwhelmed. Perhaps you want an education, a job or just a good night’s sleep. At the same time you are trying to be a good parent. Some of you might be thinking I want my child to have a better youth than I did. But guess what – we learn to parent from our parents. How were you treated as a child? I want to tell you about a wonderful group called PARENTING JOURNEY.

You can also email them at www.parentingjourney.org  . Along with other front line human services the group teaches each parent to look at how he or she was raised. It is important for each parent to recognize the good and the bad. Once a parent understands what happened to him or her, and what  inner strengths, life skills and networks of resources are really needed that parent can make better decisions.  Reach out – it will make your life easier.

You Are Not Alone

Podcasts today are what radios used to  be in the old days. Here is a podcast you should know about: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/road-to-resilience/id1399730603. Don’t have access to Apple then go to  http://icahn.mssm.edu/about/leadership/resilience or http://RoadtoResilience.buzzsprout.com.

Road To Resilience episodes are scheduled to air on the last Wednesday of each month. “The series is based on the well-received book Resilience: The Science of Mastering Life’s Greatest Challenges, co-authored by Dennis S. Charney, MD, Anne and Joel Ehrenkranz Dean of the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai, and Steven Southwick, MD, Professor of Psychiatry at Yale University. The podcast features thought-provoking insight from renowned experts as they explain the science behind resilience.”

What does this basically mean? “You have to put your trauma into context. You can’t undo it; it will always be part of you. But you can take the traumatic experience, learn from it, and incorporate it into who you are and become a stronger person,” explains Dr. Charney. “Once you’re a trauma victim you’re always a trauma victim, but part of the recovery is to make sense of that and grow.  It takes time, but you can do it and have a positive outcome.”

The series will tell you how to cope, how to become resilient, how to use your experience for you and not against you. Go for it.

Let’s Talk Denial

I talk a lot about denial because once a denial of an addiction has been conquered healing can take place. Denial is the biggest reason people do not give up addiction. Denial was first connoted by the man often called the father of psychiatry, Sigmund Freud. I actually looked up denial on Wikepedia which defines denial (also called abnegation) <as> “a defense mechanism in which a person is faced with a fact that is too uncomfortable to accept and rejects it instead, insisting that it is not true despite what may be overwhelming evidence.”

What I really found interesting is that Wikepedia defines 3 types of denial:

The best way to break through the denial is to have an intervention. Seek out a professional who works with people suffering from addiction. Go to The National Intervention for Drugs and Alcohol (NIDA) to seek out someone in your area. http://www.interventiondrugsandalcohol.org or phone (800) 567-5986